Treatment for depression Blog

Self esteem is one of the key requisites for personal growth

Six pillar of self esteem – Discover the limits to your self esteem by Kevin John

Self esteem is one of the key requisites for personal growth. Without it you will not be able to function effectively as a person or form high quality relationships with other people. Yet so often we mistake self esteem for “having a high opinion of ourselves”. There is not limit to how much genuine self esteem you can have once you are clear about what you mean by self esteem.

The six pillars of self esteem are the essential requirements to developing a healthy self esteem, but what do we mean by self esteem?

There are two parts to your self esteem:

1. The confidence to believe in yourself and your decisions. You trust your own mind to think well and cope with the basic challenges that life throws at you.

2. The feeling of self worth – you believe that you are entitled to be happy and to receive the rewards that your deserve for the efforts that you make.

Don’t confuse self esteem with arrogance

One mistake that you might mistake is to confuse self esteem with arrogance, boasting, and obnoxious, overbearing behaviour. This kind of behaviour is more often due to low self esteem leading to the need to be constantly validated by others.

If you have high self esteem you do not need to show off, after all you are confident about your own capabilities. As importantly, you don’t need the constant praising and approval of others to achieve happiness, your own self worth will tell you that you should be happy.

The idea of too much self esteem can also come from people of low self esteem – they can feel uncomfortable and unhappy when they are in the presence of someone with a much higher self esteem. What they are really saying is that they would rather deal with other people of low self esteem…

Low self esteem is not an excuse…

Another temptation is to use your self esteem as an excuse for your results. Yes self esteem is very important if you are to be happy and successful, but many people have achieved success without it.

As well as self esteem you need other personal characteristics such as energy, drive, a positive work ethic, openness to learning… A high self esteem complements and reinforces all these other characteristics.

Surveys of successful people have shown that one of the most common drivers for success is to prove themselves to someone else – a parent, a spouse, their peer group, a teacher can all have influenced them. Their drive comes from their sense of unworthiness, in other words their lack of self esteem in one area of their life.

The problems that you might encounter if you are driven by a lack of self esteem are that you will find it difficult to enjoy your success to the fullest. The fleeting moment of triumph and vindication will soon be replaced by the drive to prove yourself again. Even worse, you may feel unworthy of your success and end up sabotaging yourself…

Fortunately, there are many reasons why you might be motivated to be successful and it is possible to have a high self esteem and achieve your dreams and achieve great happiness…

There are no limits to your self esteem!

You’ve seen that self esteem is a powerful tool to help you succeed. It can be mistaken for arrogance, but true self esteem is an internal personal happiness about you and your life. Are there limits to how happy you can be?

The answer is no. You can always increase your true self esteem. Everyone, even the most self confident positive thinkers have moments of doubt, everyone has the opportunity to raise their self esteem.

As you think about your self esteem, don’t ever limit your expectations of what you can achieve. If you are prepared to work on your self esteem as part of your ongoing personal development, there are no limits to where you can go!


Would you like to learn more about the six pillars of self esteem? Visit my website for more resources, articles, and support materials
about success and personal growth here.

Kevin John has spent many years helping businesses owners, aspiring business owners, and private individuals to achieve success.


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posted by Foras Aje @ 10:43 AM 0 comments

Depression Education - Five Things You Must Know

A misconception about depression is that if a person feels intense sadness for a small period of time in reaction to some event, then that is depression. Not to imply that depression cannot be in reaction to an event, but crying after the loss of a life in the family is not depression- that is called the grieving process. That process is necessary and healthy, capable of lasting days.

The grieving process or normal sadness becomes no longer healthy when that crying goes on for weeks to months and includes feelings of worthlessness, helplessness and hopelessness for oneself and for one's own life. But a diagnosis of depression is not only comprised of a long duration of a sad feeling. Five things everyone should keep in mind when trying to detect possible depression themselves or those close to them are:


Depression can be treated with medication, psychological counseling, or a melding of the two. The counseling is necessary to discuss the loss of interest in activities a depressed person may have enjoyed and/or loss of concentration with work/school. By discussing what the depressed was getting out of an activity, he/she may slowly find reason to recommit to doing the activity, which can be therapeutic on many different levels.

Because depression tends to be internalized, it manifests itself as self hatred. Having thoughts of suicide can oftentimes seem to the depressed person who is thinking them a safe alternative to homicidal thoughts; they are not as dangerous as homicidal thoughts or not wrong at all. They do not grasp the gravity of their thoughts because a depressed person is playing by the rules of the depression and not normal behavior. If someone speaks about suicide, even flippantly, it should be taken very seriously. Whomever a depressed person confides in should constantly press for therapy and or medication as the next step.

Depression does not only manifest itself mentally. Huge amounts of weight loss or weight gain; insomnia or oversleeping, and loss of energy are all physical signals of depression.

Do not abandon therapy if your first counselor does not feel right for you. Therapy should be treated like a doctor's diagnosis: if a second, third, even fourth opinion or trial is necessary then so be it. Finding the right therapist is a heavy commitment made according to personal choice. When people are not making progress in therapy, they think that something is wrong with them and that it is not the fault of the professional. Maybe perhaps you and the therapist are not melding first as people regardless of the professional-client relationship. Maybe, the therapist reminds you of some one who drudges up negative feelings from your past causing more stress. This is something to discuss with a new therapist.

Life events like a job loss, a family member or friend dying, work stress, failed goals, marriage, as well as a divorce, new medications and drug use-can all trigger depression. Some of the preceding may even be done in reaction to an onset of depression. Some may think that it is a normal feeling to feel helpless in the aforementioned circumstances, but depression can deprive you of the ability to change your situation.



To avoid a relapse, a person prone to depression should learn to recognize when an event may become stressful and try to intercept the onset of the illness. Also depressive people avoid indulging in negative thinking by writing these feelings down in order to see their irrationality. Also a person susceptible to depression should refrain from alcohol and drugs abuse because such activity could trigger an episode.


About Author:
Grant Eckert is a writer for Carelink. Carelink is a leading provider of Community Support Services| Depression Treatment


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posted by Foras Aje @ 8:54 AM 0 comments